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Nosh

from the baffledlens

    • #baffledlens
    • #houston
    • #restaurants
  • 2 years ago
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Alas…

The Magic Time Machine restaurant in Dallas, Texas, does not, alas, contain a magic time machine. If it did, I would have taken advantage of it to go back in time to change my mind about eating there in the first place. Now, I do not own and operate any restaurants, so I am speaking here strictly from the perspective of a paying customer.

As themed restaurants go, this one had promise, at least for the kids: various characters from popular films and stories act as waiters, serving a variety of dishes in an entertaining manner. Like a time machine. Sort of. Anyway… It turns out that one has to wait 45 minutes to an hour to be seated. That can happen, sometimes. It also turns out that, after having Woody from Toy Story plug their number-one selling drink, it takes in the range of 45 minutes for meals to arrive. That can happen, too, sometimes.

In fairness, the menu did contain an item called the ‘Roman Orgy’, a dish consisting of several different kinds of meat and assorted bits and bobs. That can take a long time to put together. I understand. The amount of time it takes to prepare that kind of dish is about the same amount of time it takes to explain to the children, who have read the menu out loud for fun, just what a ‘Roman Orgy’ is. 

But that’s not the best part. The best part is what happens when one of your party prefers vegetarian dishes (this can happen, sometimes, even in Texas). When a patron asks for vegetarian options, there is only the one: a vegetable platter. Sounds alright at first, but its arrival, much later, is astonishing. The vegetable platter is an eighteen-inch long platter, covered in a variety of sliced, raw vegetables. You’re still hanging in there, aren’t you, waiting to see just how good this thing can be? Some sliced, raw vegetables can be pretty good, even for us meativores, but this, thing…was an eighteen-inch long platter heaped with raw, sliced radishes, zucchini, broccoli (okay, that one might work), turnips (!), eggplant, garlic, leeks and yam. Raw. Tough sledding. 

After all that, it takes another 45 minutes to wait for and pay the bill, notwithstanding a word or two with management. At the end of the day, the food was average and over-priced; and the wait unbearable. Management offered a coupon for a return visit, but we declined. I was left wondering if Disney’s legal department knows about this place: the wait staff was comprised of Snow White, Alice (in Wonderland), Woody, Captain Jack Sparrow, the Mad Hatter and other assorted types from various Disney films. Now, that’s a good question….

from get @baffled

    • #Dallas
    • #restaurants
    • #Texas
  • 2 years ago
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Good Eats

Do you have a favorite restaurant? Of course you do. Perhaps its the atmosphere, or the food, or the wine, or the snug little t-shirts the waitresses almost wear, but there is something about that place that makes it your favorite. Here in “industrialized” countries (do you feel industrialized?), people eat out a lot, whether it’s pub grub from just down the road or a sublime omakase journey at Masa in New York, and all stops in between. Favorite restaurants often tend to be about comfort food, and my top two restaurants are no different: for me, it is about burgers. I have two favorites and, although they both serve excellent burgers, the atmosphere in each is unique, making them a distinctly pleasant experience in their own ways.

The first (and top of the list, really) is The Red Onion in Vancouver, British Columbia. The Red Onion has been around for ages. I don’t think the prices have changed much and for my money, they serve the best burger, fries and beer around. As a bonus, there is a small and ancient television suspended in the corner above the grill allowing patrons to watch the Canucks in action. The second is Harry’s Roadhouse in Santa Fe, New Mexico. Harry’s does more than just burgers, but the burgers are excellent and every dish comes with a side of that inexplicable Santa Fe quirkiness. Their lemon meringue pie is worth waiting for as well.

Unfortunately, both of my favorites are thousands of miles from where I live. I am not saying that The Red Onion and Harry’s Roadhouse are the best restaurants in the world, but they are my favorites and they are the first stop whenever I am in town. I recommend them completely. Tell me, what’s your “favorite restaurant” story?

from get @baffled

    • #beer
    • #burgers
    • #food
    • #pie
    • #restaurants
    • #Santa Fe
    • #Vancouver
  • 3 years ago
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I am a baffled observer of the world around us; a satirist, poet, editor and researcher; a food pornographer; an ambitious but average drummer with a penchant for tabloid headlines, from H-Town, Texas, of course. Life-long dream: swim with the sharks.

These are my collected ramblings; an online compendium of utter nonsense, comprising art, culture, poetry, photography, technology and the newsworthy, arcane and inane.

All original work © "@baffled".

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