It is rare that I begin (what I hope is) a coherent argument with a “Fuck You!”, and even rarer still that I include a “and the horse you rode in on!”, but this is just such a case. If you listen to this story from NPR you will learn that certain conservative anti-immigrant groups got their knickers in a big twist during the recent election, suggesting that large numbers of undocumented immigrants would turn out to vote, illegally. What’s worse: they would be voting Democratic. The solution, according to these groups, is vigilance at polling stations and going through voting records to check the citizenship status of those who voted Democratic.
First of all, it seems patently absurd to think that any undocumented immigrant would want to risk drawing attention to themselves by voting. Secondly, how is it that these asshats are able to go through voting records to check on anyone’s citizenship status? Why bother to give us private voting booths if the record of our votes, including our names, addresses and all that, can be reviewed by anyone and his dog at a later date?
Is “immigrant voter fraud” really the biggest thing we need to worry about during elections? Really? What about corporations being able to make unlimited donations and spend without limit on attack advertising? What about physical assaults on protesters by candidates’ campaign personnel? What about all the other shenanigans we hear about?
Fuck you, Ban Amnesty Now and ALAPAC, and the horses you rode in on…
“There is not enough bacon in the entire kingdom to make up for such fuckery.”